cursor by thetremblingofmyhand
    waitress: i'm sorry we're all out of mozzarella sticks
    waitress: sir please stop cyring

xgenepositive:

nosdrinker:

no dog should ever be homeless

no home should ever be dogless

(Source: nosdrinker, via eye-sexing-destiel)

mentally-illectric:

things i needed to hear in health class:

  • puberty might make you squishier and its ok
  • vaginas have a smell and it’s a ok
  • all kinds of people with all kinds of bodies have gr8 sex
  • genitals do not all look the same and variety is rad
  • people have stretch marks sometimes
  • people have pimples on their butts sometimes
  • people have cellulite sometimes
  • gender =/= sex
  • sex =/= scary danger FEAR
  • bodies aren’t scary or gross or sacred 
  • everything is ok

(via perfectionisttendencies)

goodenoughforjazz:

justin bieber looks like the kinda guy that would take some of your fries without asking

(via sh0tgunshutshis-tardis)

pantslesswrock:

trickstersgambit:

dilapidatedragamuffin:

Can we talk about Spy Kids 3 for a second because it’s just the MOST BAFFLING CINEMATIC EXPERIENCE EVER

First we open to LITTLE BABY SELENA GOMEZ

image

THE PRESIDENT IS GEORGE CLOONEY?

image

Later we see Juni’s grandpa who is KHAN??

image

who spends the whole movie chasing a butterfly

image

THE VILLAIN IS SYLVESTER STALLONE

image

WHO GETS VILLAIN ADVICE FROM THREE OTHER SYLVESTER STALLONES

image

ELIJAH WOOD SHOWS UP

image

ONLY TO DIE IN THE NEXT SCENE

image

Then we find out that the president was actually the villain the whole time which makes ZERO SENSE but leads to this glorious George Clooney Sylvester Stallone impression

image

image

image

image

Then we get Antonio Benderez doing this?

image

image

AND THEIR UNCLE WHO IS STILL MACHETE image

AND THEN STEVE BUSCEMI SHOWS UP ON A FLYING PIG FOR NO REASON

image

HOW WAS THIS A MOVIE???

Don’t forget it was in the 3d that required red and blue lenses and came with three packs in the dvd case.

this movie was perfect

(via cinnacorn)

inkskinned:

idk man it just makes me so so so sad when you’re watching a cutiepie talk about their passion like when they light up and start bubbling over with words and then all of a sudden they stop themselves and say stuff like “sorry, i know this is boring” or “sorry i just got excited”

like you know somewhere in their life someone they respected told them “shut up nobody cares” and ever since they can’t talk about their favorite things without apologizing every 5 seconds

(via drinkyourfuckingmilk)

riva-mika:

just because i ship it doesnt mean i expect it to become canon

(via drinkyourfuckingmilk)

owlmylove:

when i find stretch marks on my thighs i make a point of smooching them because they’re just doing their best at keeping the all-powerful immortal Being within me from ripping my mortal shell asunder in a blaze of heavenly glory and eviscerating the cosmos in my divine wrath

(via drinkyourfuckingmilk)